PMS is nothing compared to what has hit me in the last two days. Out of nowhere I am a completely weepy emotional wreck. I miss my dad. I miss Jim. I'm freaking out about doing this alone. And I'm full of hormones. I'm having a day that feels like PMS times a hundred, and I guess it's going to be like this for a while. Wish I could just go home and sit in my rocking chair and hug a pillow and feel sad for a while until I feel better.
I know it's temporary. I just wish it didn't come over me like this at work. I'm finding my emotions very, very hard to control, and it's really strange. Boom, tears. Out of nowhere. Oh, pregnancy!
I hesitated to post this because I thought that sharing this might result in a bunch of emails from concerned relatives (you know who you are...Aunt Judy). But I also want to be completely honest about what I'm going through and the journey I'm on. I am absolutely thrilled to be pregnant with a healthy baby boy, but sometimes I am momentarily overwhelmed with the enormity of it all. And today on my way in to work I just started crying. For no reason. I can't seem to control my emotions at all. And as the daughter of the ever-solid-don't-show-your-emotions Terri, I'm a little freaked out by the loss of control. I guess I'd better get used to it since I'm going to have a lot of things out of control from now on. :)
2 comments:
Aw! Hopefully it helps to know there are LOTS of hormones involved. Anyway, I predict you won't be a single mom forever, hard as that is to imagine now.
XOXO
H
Hey Heather. In my more sane moments I'm fine with everything just as it is. I wouldn't be doing this if I wasn't. But you aren't kidding about the hormones. My friend Sarah (who is 7 months pregnant) and I take turns reminding each other at work that the tears are mostly because of the hormones. It's amazing what they do to you and how much it helps to have friends to remind you that hormones ARE a factor.
Loving the dog photos on your blog. Totally jealous of your time at the ranch.
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