Zoo Boo

We were all tired and cold and hungry when we got out of the car in the packed parking lot at Green Bay's N.E.W. Zoo, but Grandma had the pre-paid tickets and the kids had costumed-up, so we braved the crowds and the dropping temps and bundled up and headed in.  We were immediately greeted by bounce houses and loud music and a dance floor full of kids doing the electric slide with a giraffe and an otter, and within five minutes Darth Vader was running one way and Princess Leia was running another, and Grandma TT and I knew it was going to be a great evening.  In the kids petting zoo there was a spooky corn maze and a giant spider climbing over gravestones and a bloody veterinarian passing out candy.  The albino alligator case was filled with creepy ghouls and ghosts, and the penguin tank had its own scary scuba sea monster giving high fives against the glass.  The kids went from candy station to candy station, stopping along the way to look at swans and buffalo and mountain lions and monkeys and ghosts and zombies and mummies, and had Mommy and Grandma not gotten cold, the kids probably would have stayed all night.  What a fun, fun evening!  Thank you, Grandma!

Halloween in the St. Mary's Parking Lot

The cold, fall rain comes down fast as we pull forward in the St. Mary's parking lot, and Sam points to the small white statue on the west side of the building.

"There's Jesus's mom," he says. 

"Yep,"  I say.  "That's Mary."

Anyone who knows me will tell you that I don’t fret about a whole lot when it comes to parenting.  I generally feel comfortable with decisions I make and mostly have an attitude that they will turn out okay no matter what.  But some of my closer friends will tell you that there are two things I do worry over: what to teach my children about God, and what is the best schooling solution for our family. 

"Jesus is everywhere," Sam says, and his 4-and-a-half-year-old friend E who sits in the booster seat beside him agrees.

I won’t lie.  Sam goes to a Catholic pre-school not because I believe anything they teach him about Jesus and God but because it’s the most convenient pre-school for my work situation.  I don’t know what I believe about Jesus and God, but I also know that Sam is learning to be a good and loving person from good and loving people.  And the school is just a few blocks from my office.

"Jesus is in your heart.  He's everywhere.  Even in your skeleton," Sam says.

"He's not in a skeleton," E says.  "Skeletons aren't real."

"Yes they are.  They're your bones.  Your bones are real."

"But skeletons are not real."

"Yes they are," Sam insists.  "Everyone has a skeleton inside them.  Your brain tells them what to do.  When you want to move your hand, your brain sends a message to your bones and your hand moves.  And when you walk your brain sends a message to your foot to walk.  Skeletons are real."

And there you have it.  Sam sums up science and religion and Halloween in the St. Mary's parking lot.  This mama has nothing to worry about.

(This post has been modified since I originally posted it, and it's part of my series of blog posts for thenextfamily.com.)

Just Like That

Before she was born I often wondered how it would be possible that I would love another child as much I loved my first born, how another child could take over my heart in that same way.  But as soon as I saw her, all screaming red mad, nearly 10 pounds of feisty girl opinion, I adored Eva.  And when she snuggled up to my chest and her wet, warm little head melted against my skin I knew it was possible to love more than one child with all my heart.

Last weekend I was in the kitchen cleaning (don’t so many of my blog posts start this way?) and I heard water running in the bathroom. I turned the corner to see Eva sitting on the toilet, her little butt pressed onto the potty seat and her chubby feet resting on the stool.  She had seen Sammy sit like this dozens of times, and while I was cleaning she had piled her black stretch pants and her dry diaper on the rug and placed the stool and the potty seat and crawled up to go potty all by herself.

When I told Jamie she suggested big girl underwear might be a good birthday present, and here we are two years after, as Sam says, “the doctor cut Eva out of your belly.”  Two years.  Just like that. 

We walked in to Gunderson Lutheran today to visit the pediatrician for her two-year well visit and Eva strutted through the doors and announced “I want see birdies.”  How she remembered the little aviaries set up throughout the clinic I do not know, but my highly verbal, independent, opinionated two-year-old lights up my life every single day. 

“I do it,” she says when I try to buckle her car seat.

“I want other shoes,” she says when I try to put on her blue shoes and she wants the black shoes.

“I no like ‘cado,” she says when I place dinner in front of her.  “I like ‘matoes.  I like ‘matoes, no cut.”

“Sammy no like bananas,” she says when I hand her breakfast in the morning.  “I like bananas.  Sammy no like bananas.”

“Kids no have it,” she says when she gets out of the car at Jamie’s in the morning carrying an apple slice or a Ritz cracker.

“Look mom,” she says as she stands on the arm of the couch and imitates her brother.  “I no careful.  Look mom.  I no careful.”

“I too little,” she laughs as she gets up from a face-plant into the carpeting because she sometimes thinks she can do everything her big brother does and living room gymnastics are part of his daily routine.

Every day with Eva brings new surprises that make me laugh, and when she and I read a book and rock together for a quick ten minutes alone before bedtime every night I sometimes want to slow it all down, pay more attention, memorize her face and her laugh and her adorable little voice before everything changes.

Two years.  Just like that.

I'm the Guest

 

We had planned the weekend for a while, and Sam had requested pizza and homemade ice cream for dinner and living room tent-sleeping for the rest of the night.  So I loaded the refrigerator with goodies and pulled the tent out of the closet and prepared myself for a long night of craziness and children who had no interest in sleeping.  What I got instead was an evening of delight and wonder, starting with the barefoot children running bases at "the school bus park" and ending with two boys reading an animal sticker book by flashlight before they collapsed next to each other, both of them clad in Spiderman PJ's.

Sammy's best buddy is perhaps the easiest child on the planet, a sweet smiling boy with a mop of white blond hair and an aversion to shoes or socks or coats.  He was happy to be at our house and excited about everything.  And when he and Sam disagreed for the first time I told Sam that Espn got to choose because he's the guest.

"Just like from Mike the Knight," Sam said.

As the youngest of five Espn was thrilled to actually have the decision power in his hands so when we had to decide what kind of ice cream to make and whether to play with Lego or Trio and whether to play baseball or ride bikes, he played the guest card.  "Sam, I'm the guest," he would remind us.  Sam didn't mind.  His best buddy (who Eva, by the way, adores) was there for the whole night!  What a great way to spend a Friday.

This video is dark for about 20 seconds, but after that the flashlight comes on and we get to hear Espn remind us who the guest is.  So dang cute.

Girls Can Drive Dumptrucks and Boys Can Dance

Another installment for The Next Family:

“I wish our family had two moms,” Sam says, and I am caught by surprise.  I am loading the dishes into the dishwasher while Sam puts the head on his new Lego alien minifigure and Eva pulls at my pantsleg begging for her bedtime cup of milk.

“Why is that?” I ask.  Our family has one parent.  One mom.  And it’s never going to have two moms.

“Because moms are great, and if there were two moms one could play with me while the other mom puts Eva to bed.”

Since he came home from the hospital I’ve been talking to Sam about how all families are different.  We have books that talk about big families and small families, families that adopt, families with two moms or two dads, families with just one parent.  We have books that explain IVF and how a child can come in to the world with just a mom. 

“That would be nice, wouldn’t it?” I say, both pleased and curious as to why he didn’t say he wishes our family had a dad.

We know lots of different kinds of families.  Families with adopted kids.  Families with foster kids.  Families with moms and dads.  Families with just one mom.  But I don’t know that Sam has ever been exposed to a family with two moms, and I wonder where this came from.  Has he already learned the wrong message that moms do all the kid stuff and take care of everything or is he just wishing there were two mommies because he wants two of ME?

I lift Eva on to my hip and drop silverware into the dishwasher before handing her a sippy cup, but these thoughts stay with me as I walk into the nursery and change Eva’s diaper.  Eva holds up the Cinderella and Snow White dolls that came with her Little People princess castle from Grandma.  Earlier in the day Cinderella drove a dumptruck while Snow White road in the bucket, and Snow White answered the door when the fix-it guy (that actually came with the dumptruck) came to fix the broken balcony on the castle and ended up dancing in front of the princess mirror.  And before I put Eva into her crib Snow White and Cinderella will be placed side by side in the little pink plastic bed on the top floor of the castle and Eva will tell me “Shhhhh.  They sleeping.”

Eva is just on the verge of learning boy versus girl, and now that he’s in pre-school Sam explains to me about girl things and boy things, but I hope that both of my children will always believe that girls can drive dumptrucks and boys can dance and the world is made up of all kinds of families including families with two moms.

You can see all my previous blog posts for TNF here.

For information on Minnesotans United for All Families and the upcoming marriage amendment vote in Minnesota click here.

Life is Better with TT

Every morning last week Sam woke up and told me how many more sleeps until TT arrived, and on Friday at 6:30am he sat straight up and yelled "TT comes today!"  And when I picked him up at school for the daily shuttle to Jamie's he said,  "I'm so happy now because TT is almost here!"  He does not hide the fact that he loves TT, and on more than one occasion he's told me he wishes TT lived with us.  Too bad he can't talk her in to that as easily as he can talk her in to bologna or Ready Whip or over-priced plastic toys that shoot projectiles.

We love it when Grandma has business in town and we get an extra visit.  This weekend's visit was especially nice because the beautiful weather allowed us to enjoy another trip to Ferguson's and an awesome dinner outside on the deck.  It went way too fast and we're already counting down the days until October 26th.