Friday, April 11, 2014

Kicking Balls and Discovering Subs

 
 
As the snow melted and we began our on-again-off-again love affair with April showers, we dug out last year's soccer cleats (which thankfully still fit) and struggled once again with shin guards and long sweaty socks before Sam ran out on to the field to begin another season with Euro Soccer.  Old friends and new returned, and the moms caught up and tried not complain about the weather too much.  And Eva and Sam loved the fact that soccer in town meant dinner in town too...Toppers or McD's or the new favorite, Subway.
 
 
 

Sunday, April 6, 2014

Bye Bye Seymour

When I first noticed that Dagny was shrinking and consuming a lot of water but not a lot of dry cat food, she had already lost about half her body weight.  Down to under 15 pounds from her maximum weight a few years earlier over 23 pounds.  The first round of tests cost me $293 and led to the conclusion that more tests were needed.  Second round was $584.  And over the course of the next 6 weeks I spent another $142 on testing and then $50 every two weeks for special meds and bags of IV fluids which I had to hang from a wall so I could pinch her skin and stab a needle in and give her fluids twice a day to keep her alive because it felt like the humane thing to do.  Dagny was 12 years old and I only had one child, a 14-month-old who was just starting to walk and didn't get in too much trouble and slept (mostly) through the night.  When dagny started hiding under the bed with no interest in coming out to eat or drink, I knew the end was near, and on the day I contemplated whether I have her put too sleep, I came home from work to find that she had crawled into a empty Pampers box lying on the dining room floor and died.
 
Her brother Seymour didn't seem phased at all by her sudden absence, and he continued to eat and talk (almost constantly) for several years before he too started to shrink.  Whether or not Seymour became afflicted with the same kidney failure that killed Dagny I will never know for sure.  I did not bring him in for $1000 worth of testing, and I never let a vet talk me in to IV fluids.  With two demanding children who need my attention and barely enough time for myself as it is, when Seymour started shrinking, I immediately started buying the expensive, fluid-excessive cat foods that the vet had insisted I give to Dagny 5 years ago.  And I kept his litter and his water dish clean and full.  And the kids and I spent enough time with him that Eva even got over her fear of animals and started insisting that she got to feed the kitty. 
 
Last week during one of the rare afternoons when I was alone in the house I noticed that Seymour was not lifting his head from his cat bed, that he didn't seem interested in moving towards me at all.  I found him weak and dehydrated, so in the fifteen minutes I had before I had to pick up the kids I washed him clean and got him a fresh bed in the basement and tried to get him to take some water or food.  But it was clear to me he wouldn't last the night, and I had to decide how to handle it with the kids.  In the end I left him alone down there and checked on him a couple of times.  A friend told me she believed that animals liked to die alone, that it was too hard for them to move on with us there.  I don't know whether or not I believe that, but I do know I'm grateful that Seymour died some time during the hour between bedtime snack and the time both children were asleep.  When I found him he was stretched out as if the sun were shining on him, and I was glad the kids weren't there.
 
I told Sam the next day when he and I were alone in the car.  He said he was a little sad, but it was okay because Seymour was way up in the sky with Dagny and Grandpa Jim.  Then he wanted to know if everyone that ever lived went to heaven, wouldn't there be cavemen there and wouldn't it be really crowded and do they eat in heaven and what kinds of things do they do in heaven and I found myself remembering those early conversations about Grandpa Jim.
 
I didn't tell Eva until the next day when she grabbed a can of cat food and said she wanted to go feed the kitty.
 
"We can't, Honey.  The kitty is dead.  Seymour died a few days ago."
 
She looked at me and plopped the can on the kitchen counter and said "Oh" before leaving the room to play with Barbies.

Monday, March 31, 2014

Spring Lessons


When the warm air finally arrived and most of the snow shrunk away from the driveway, we headed out for some outdoor play and ended up spending most of the day in the sunshine.  With a 3-year-old who wants to do everything her big brother does and a 6-year-old who wants to do things without his little sister tagging along and "messing things up" I often feel pulled in two directions at once.  But we dusted off the bikes and the soccer balls and the sandbox and occasionally took some deep breaths during some epic 3-year-old meltdowns and enjoyed our first REAL spring weekend.  And when I failed to follow the rules of soccer play, Sam asked me if maybe I wanted some lessons instead.  Lesson One: Dribbling.  Lesson Two: Stay close to the ball so it's harder for the opponent to take it away from you. Lesson Three: Use the side of your foot.

Lesson Four... Even if everyone has their own ball the three-year-old will cry that you're not playing with her enough so open the sandbox and give her something else to do.
















Friday, March 28, 2014

Two Conversations About Sleep



The Three Year Old

On the first Wednesday of spring, our car winds along the frozen backwaters of the Mississippi River, and I glance in the rear view mirror.  Eva's eyelids are heavy.  The kids spent the night before at Jamie's and the night before that Eva spent two hours after bedtime doing the I-need-a-drink-I-have-to-go-potty-will-you-buy-cookies-tomorrow torture that has become a regular nighttime routine.  She hasn't slept great for two nights in a row.  It is almost five o'clock and if she falls asleep on the way home the bedtime routine tonight will be even more torturous than usual.

"Eva," I say.  "Don't go to sleep.  Stay awake.  We're almost home."

"Don't worry about it, Mom," she says.  "Don't worry about me.  You worry about yourself!"


The Six Year Old

On the first Wednesday of spring, Sam and I lay under the rocket blanket on his bed with one of the new books he brought home from school, one of the books that I snuck in to the Scholastic book order after he picked out Lego early readers and Star Wars phonics sets.  National Geographic First Big Book of Why.  He always tells me that he is smart because he likes science, and he and I enjoy reading science books after Eva's in bed.  I tell him he can pick out 2 more questions to read and then it's lights out.  We read an explanation of why you need to sleep at night, how the body needs to rest to take care of itself, to keep your mind from getting confused or angry or sad.  The second question he picks is about why we have dreams and nightmares.  The book explains that everything we see and touch and smell and hear during the day is tumbled around and when we sleep the brain makes mashed up movies of all these things.

"That doesn't make sense!" he says. 

"What doesn't?"

"They said your brains needs to rest at night but then they said dreams are when your brain is playing at night.  Which is it?"

"Good question, Sam.  That's a really good question."

Sunday, March 16, 2014

March 2014

Random photos from the last month of crazy.  (Notice the moving boxes.)








With Eva, even a quiet Sunday morning painting session is full of drama...





Friday, February 21, 2014

Snowstorms and Dumplings


With a road-closing winter storm leaving a couple inches of ice followed by a foot of snow on our driveway and three runny noses trapped in our house, I was not the only one who was excited about chicken noodle soup with cheese-filled dumplings.

Monday, February 17, 2014

Valentine's Day 2014

Random pictures from the weekend in which TT showed up with flowers and balloons and more groceries than we could possibly eat.  Thanks for another awesome weekend, TT.  We love when you visit.








Friday, February 7, 2014

Just Bend Your Knees


Despite the nearly constant barrage of sub zero temperatures this winter, Sam has managed to ski most Thursdays while I sit in the heated car and chat with other moms or run to Hyvee to pick up groceries for dinner.  And on the night they tackled the big hill I told him he'd have to teach me how to do that.  I've never had a lesson.  I've never learned the tricks to staying upright while soaring down the steep hills.  So during one of the few sunny Saturdays in January in which the temperatures actually climbed in to the double digits above zero for a few hours, we laced up our skis and hit the slopes in our backyard.  Sam is learning to ski without poles, so I left mine in the snow and made circles around the yard.  And while Eva got in on the action trudging through the deep snow, Sam screamed at me to "Bend your knees!  Just bend your knees, Mommy!  It's easy."

Apparently when the hills get steep you just need to lower your center of gravity and focus and let go of any fear of falling. The things our children teach us.